Fences Between Us

There’s a fence between us and I want to knock it down,

I miss you.

I can see you between the spaces, but I can’t touch you,

I long to hold you.

You can see me, but you can’t hear me, the weather is cloudy and dark,

I want to talk to you.

Our whole marriage has felt like a waiting game, these fences keep coming between something…a new place to live, a new home, a new job, our future,

I want to smell the cologne on your neck.

Another fence sits before me now and I want to knock it down.

I love you.

kms

Daddy Doll

Ha Ha!  Apparently, you had to go to the bathroom because this is where I found you tonight on our daily "hunt for Daddy" at bedtime.  I love how you are always lovingly covered up by her other "precious"--towel.

PS. If anyone wants one, here's where we got him:  https://www.daddydolls.com

Little Weed

Oh, Little Weed, how you grow so fast,
In spite of Daddy's wish to make childhood last
Your legs are sprouting beneath your pajamas,
as you morph into a mini version of Momma.
Our credit card is aflame just keeping up 
seems like just yesterday when we had to pick you up!

kms

Grieving isn't easy...

I took this photo of my dad only 7 months ago, at my nephew's high school graduation.  He sits next to my brother, a man who grew up to call Dad his best friend.  At the time, we didn't know how sick he really was, how soon he would leave us and how much we would cherish moments like this as we look back.  Grieving isn't easy.  The ache in my heart hits me hard and very randomly.  I often hear his voice in my head, mostly his laugh, the way he answered the phone "Yellow!",  his closing, "I love you, Baby" and his wonderful bear hugs.  He wasn't perfect, we had many moments that were frustrating and annoying but they were trivial and quickly forgiven and forgotten.  God, I hope you're taking good care of our dad because we sure miss him.

I'm a lush for Lush

These little beauties are pretty enough to eat!  I just love to indulge in bath products, I'm sure I was a very wealthy woman in a former life...I'm sure my daughter was too.  These bath bombs, soaps, facial scrubs and lip balms are so decadent, if you haven't tried, do--you deserve it!  I choose this shop, Lush, because they never test on animals, all of their products are handmade and fabulous!

www.lush.com

I Love Love

I looked at a bunch of photography sites today and I came across a wedding photography site that inspired me.  So, I played around with these two little guys and came up with this shot.  It makes me smile, I hope it does the same for you.  Mmmmmwah!

ps. Yes, I ate them afterwards, is that wrong?

Whirling Dervish

I took my own advice and put the phone down, turned off the computer and went outside to play with my daughter today!  "Push me faster, FASTER!!!"  Is what she was saying, I used to love the same thing when I was her age.  After we played here we built a sand castle, with a moat, a bridge and plenty of windows for the animals to see out (her idea).  Fun day with mini-me.

Happy Birthday Lauri

To my Sister Friend, Lauri
We were so young when we first me, but your laugh is still the same.
Our wrinkles give away the years but the memories remain.
You have been by my side through thick and thin...through broken hearts and new loves.
Our lives have changed, grown, been happy, and sad, and through it all, I called you, you listened.  
You are the godmother to my daughter, you stood beside me when I said, "I do",
I love you, my friend, thank you for being you.

Happy Birthday, old lady! You're beautiful!

Beauty Beyond the Technology

I know, another picture of my iPhone...but when I was looking at it sitting on the table I caught a reflection of some flowers and it reminded me to put the phone down more often and look up.  Look at nature, my daughter, pet my dog, take a walk and (gasp) leave my phone behind.  All too often we see parents at the park with their kids and the kids are swinging or playing while the parent is sitting on the bench texting, checking email or playing candy crush (guilty).  Perhaps we should declare a no-tech hour each day and remember to stop and enjoy something living instead.  

Too Much Candy Crush

My hot, slippery fingerprints betray me, too much Candy Crush today!  

Small Miracles

Here's mini-me, reading without me even asking!  She came home from school happy about finding a book she liked and chose to READ instead of watch TV.  I would compare my excitement to the moment the Grinch's heart grew and grew and grew on Christmas thanks to Cindy Lou Who!  Since she is Little Miss Bossy Pants, she supervised the editing of this image and vetoed my decision to make this black and white, but I did please her by editing out the boo boos on her legs and feet.  All I can say is, thank God for small miracles!

ps. The ONLY reason she allowed me to post this image was because I earned a star (from her) by following my diet today.  Unreal.

Light Bright

My daughter played on this larger than life "Light Bright" at the amazing new Children's Museum in Austin today.  It was fun and took me back to when I used to play (for hours) on my own Light Bright when I was a kid, although, mine was exponentially smaller.  Being a kid is pretty awesome!

Check it out if you're in Austin:  The Thinkery:  www.thinkeryaustin.org

Cork Philosophy

I was shooting this pile of corks when I saw this goodie among them and thought, "how true!"  I would add, a meal without people you love is also like a day without sunshine.  I love the art of eating a three-hour meal with people you enjoy, people who allow you to be yourself (and still love you), people who are not looking at their phones or watches or thinking about anything but sitting there with you, in that moment, with wine.

I had one of those weekends with people I love and for that, I feel happy and grateful.

Wet Nose

I see this old, wet nose every time I walk my dog.  
I also see a wagging tail through the cracks of the fence.  
He's so friendly, he only wants to play, 
I wish I could release him, if only for a day.

Snow Globe

Here's a peek at a pretty little thing.  The child in me still loves to watch these tiny specs dance around inside the glass globe, wishing they would never settle…but they always do.  

Perfect Practice Makes Perfect

Everything you need to know in life, you learned in Kindergarden.  A few years ago, my daughter learned the saying "perfect practice makes perfect" and she's right.  I just hated my edit on the tulips yesterday so I did a reshoot and re-edit and feel much more satisfied now.  It wasn't exactly perfect so clearly I needed more practice, right?  Even though my poor little tulips are barely hanging on...I think they are much prettier today than they were yesterday.  I could say the same about myself.

Tulips in January

My love for flowers

a rose
a tulip
a dandelion
bring a twinkle to my eye
bring a curve to my lips
and warmth in my heart


a.m.f

I wish I knew the author of this pretty, little poem because I would thank her for capturing my feelings so eloquently.  I often buy myself flowers for just this reason.  They comfort me and remind me of all the beauty in the world.

Shadow Selfie

After spending dozens of hours recovering from my recent identity theft, I decided that this is the "me" I want strangers to see.  I am not yet ready to put myself back out into the world.  I've been stolen and I'm still recovering from this crime.  The fear and the anger still lingers.

Mad Hatters Tea Party

Here's my lovely friend, Susan at the Mad Hatters Tea Party last night.  She has been my guide to all the wonderful weirdness that makes up Austin.  This event was the 25th Birthday celebration of the Vortex Theater in SE Austin, it's quite indie and super fun!  

http://www.vortexrep.org

1st Confession

Today was our daughters' first confession.  She was terribly nervous (she called it "stage fright") but she found her courage, she mentally prepared and did great.  The priest was kind and washed away her fears and calmed her nerves.  When she walked out she said, "Mom, I'm going to do the dishes for you today.  Because, I love to wash dishes anyway."  Apparently, he told her to do something nice for me, obviously, she chose something she liked, but that's ok.  Then we sat in the pew and did her requisite 3 Hail Mary's and now we are off to Chuck-e-Cheese for her reward!  I wonder if my mom got to go out for pizza and video games when she had her 1st confession?  Somehow, I doubt it.  (I can almost hear her laughing from here.)